6 Tips to Overcome Relationship Anxiety
Many people describe the butterflies and nerves they get when they’re in a new relationship. Some people still have those same “happy” nerves even after years of being with someone. But there’s a difference between butterflies and anxiety. Relationship anxiety can cause you to feel insecure, worried, and even doubtful about your relationship. You might feel like you aren’t good enough for your partner or that you’re not compatible. This type of anxiety is often rooted in childhood attachment issues. But that doesn’t mean you can’t overcome it as an adult.
Let’s look at a few tips that can help you deal with relationship anxiety and eventually overcome it.
1. Discover the Root
One of the best ways to overcome anxiety is to figure out what’s causing it. Maybe you were in a bad relationship in the past that’s fueling your worries now. Maybe you do have attachment issues from childhood that have damaged your self-esteem.
Figuring out the root cause of relationship anxiety isn’t always easy, but it doesn’t have to be done on your own. Working with a therapist is a fantastic way to dig deeper and uncover the center of your fears.
2. Talk to Your Partner
Being vulnerable in a relationship is difficult when you’re already self-conscious about things. But opening up to your partner about how you’re feeling can make a big difference. Not only will it help them understand some of your thoughts and behaviors, but they’ll be able to be a source of support for you. It will make your relationship stronger.
3. Feelings Aren’t Always Facts
You’re absolutely allowed to feel your feelings. They have value, and you should listen to them and respect them. But feelings aren’t always facts. If your anxiety is trying to get the best of you, pause for a moment and think about whether your worries are rooted in reality or not. If you can take a deep breath and separate fact from fiction, you’ll take some of the power away from those intrusive thoughts.
4. Build Trust in Other Relationships
While connecting with your partner and overcoming anxiety in your romantic relationship is important, having other healthy relationships in your life is just as essential. It’s not uncommon for people with relationship anxiety to struggle with trust. Work on building it with friends and family members. Spend more time with people you love. The more you do, the more comfortable you’re likely to feel. You’ll also build up your support system, which can make a big difference when your anxiety feels too intrusive.
5. Self-Soothe
There will be times when your relationship anxiety feels more intense. Maybe you’re making assumptions about your partner. Maybe you’re struggling with the idea of not being good enough for them. Whatever the case, finding ways to self-soothe in those moments is important. Things like deep breathing, meditation, and mindfulness can make a big difference. Even stopping for a few minutes to focus on your breath can help you relax and let go of those negative thoughts.
6. Seek Professional Help
We touched on the importance of therapy above, but if you’re really struggling with relationship anxiety, it’s one of the best ways to overcome it. Therapy can absolutely help you get to the root cause of your anxiety. But that’s just the beginning. A therapist will work with you to develop helpful, healthy strategies to cope with your anxiety. They can help you see yourself and your relationship in a different light. They’ll also teach you the skills necessary to overcome your anxiety every day.
You deserve to be happy and content within your relationship. Your partnership isn’t doomed because you struggle with relationship anxiety. Remember these tips to overcome those feelings, and don’t hesitate to seek help when you need it.
