Discernment Counseling might be helpful. I can help you clarify what has to change if you are to stay in the marriage, and help you make that clear to your spouse in a non-antagonistic way. I can also help you figure out what you would need to change in yourself in a healthier marriage in the future.

However, if you are really low on hope, Discernment Counseling is by far the best approach to gain clarity and confidence on what got you to this point and the work both of you would need to do individually if there were to be real momentum for your marriage.

If you and your spouse have hope, motivation, and energy for a serious round of couples therapy, belief that things could improve, and you’re willing to look at your role in the dysfunction that is going on, you may benefit from going right to couples therapy.